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I love music, but don’t make any of my own. I do make a nuance out of endorsing a new CD or artist to all my friends however.

To be male, to be a folk music fan, is to be ridiculed.

For the past few months I’ve thrown an album or two, per week, into my folder on my company’s shared network. I never knew if anyone was taking advantage of this until I put in Rachael Yamagata’s album. A whole bunch of people thanked me and said they loved it. Who knew, I don’t even think the album is that great, save for a couple songs. Since then I kept with the trend of female folky kinds of singer/songwriters. This was my most recent all staff email:

thereminder.jpg

Keeping with my recent music trends I’ve put Feist – The Reminder in my shared folder. She’s Canadian and her song “One Two Three Four” is probably in your head right now—it’s the annoyingly catchy song used in the iPod Nano commercials. It’s a great album, if you’re into that type of thing. I have two of her older albums too if you’re interested (they aren’t in my shared right now.)

I figured this would be right up everyone’s alley. I love the album, the songs really are catchy. No good deed goes unpunished however since the only response I got was this:

On 9/24/07 9:46 AM, “Bennett, Chuck” <***@martinoflynn.com> wrote:
Hey Justin. I was looking through your music collection and determined that you are missing something.
I placed it in your shared folder.

Color me intrigued. I go to check it out and find the folllowing:

finder.png

Well played sir, well played.

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Best Text Message Ever

A sea gull just hit my head and took my sandwich. Everything is ruined.

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Shakespeare said “Your Mom Did”

This is unbelievably awesome.

Although [your mom] may appear to be a recent phenomenon, one can trace its roots far back in history. Indeed, William Shakespeare appears to utilize such a device in Act I Scene 1 of Timon of Athens:

Painter: “Y’are a dog.”
Apemantus: “Thy mother’s of my generation. What’s she, if I be a dog?”

“Your mom” can be combined with most types of insults, although suggestions of promiscuity, obesity, or lack of intelligence are particularly common.

“Your mom” is also sometimes used as a sarcastic retort to either a mild criticism or even an innocuous statement. This often results in a sexual innuendo, as in the following example:

Speaker 1: What are you doing?
Speaker 2: Your mom!

Another technique is to respond to the original speaker with “your mom” substituted in for the original subject of the sentence, as follows:

Speaker 1: That car looks like trash.
Speaker 2: Your mom looks like trash.

This all started, by the way, when a few of us were talking about Pogs at work. Remember Pogs? Me and Scott both have fond memories of rushing down to the Pog store to stock up each afternoon after school. Frank’s a bit older and missed the craze. So I thought I’d sent out some info:

On 6|26|07 19:08 PM, “Dickinson, Justin” wrote:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pogs
On 6|27|07 8:33 AM, “Piacitelli, Frank” wrote:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lame
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marbles
BAM !
On 6|27|07 8:35 AM, “Wolf, Scott” wrote:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Your_Mom
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The Nocket Files: Vol. II

A conversation I had today with one Dan Nocket (via email)

Dan
“I feel like Mcgyver. I managed to repair a pair of ripped jeans with some fabric scraps from an old shirt and epoxy.”
Me
“Gay”
Dan
“…says the guy who tolls the Kraft site looking for recipes.”
Me
“That was the first result to a google search. Eat a bag of dicks†!”
Dan
“What the heck did you search for? ‘I’m gay and I want to bake something for my office’?”
Me
“I was looking for it specifically so I searched for ‘ghosts in the graveyard’ Incidentally, your search yields no results. For now.”

Not any more I guess…

† Phrase gleefully lifted from NLO

Volume One

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The Nocket Files: Vol. I

A conversation I had today with one Dan Nocket (via email)

Dan
“I forgot to mention the auditory travesty last Tuesday. So we’re sitting inside the bar listening to the Tuesday mix; think bad techno (Fridays, where there are $1 drinks, has an awesome rock mix). We’re enduring most of the stuff when the Pirates of the Caribbean theme dance mix comes on. I’ve never wanted to hurt a DJ so much.”
Me
“That’s pretty lame. In other news, I got shit-faced last night. Woo-hoo!”
Dan
“You had better not been alone.”

Is this really what my friends think of me? Dang yo…

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